What's with the Beard?
by captainbartholomew
Summary: Everybody in the WWE wants to know why RKO has a beard!  Can two private eye detectives figure it out with the help of a certain MKOing star?  Or will there not be justice until Randy shaves! One-shot.


**Hey all! Random one-shot time once again!**

**Before we begin the disclaimer is going to be a tad different this time around. Ahem… I do not own anything affiliated with WWE, i.e. Cena, Orton, Ryder, etc. **

**I also do not own Matthew Orton that is SuspiciousInitials OC. He was kind enough to let me borrow him. You can find Matt Orton in his Double RKO stories if you wish to know more.**

**I also do not own Watson. She is owned by caylendar. You can find her in caylendar's random one-shots dealing with TMNT. Check 'em out!**

**And finally, I do own my OC Homes. With that said I want you to imagine the cheesiest detective movie you possibly can. Think black and white with trench coats and magnifying glasses. Think Sherlock Holmes and Watson. With that image in your head, Read On… fan girls AND fan boys… Read On…**

What's with the Beard?

(XXXX)

(Watson's POV)

Why did I let Homes talk me into this?

Sure, starting a private eye detective agency had sounded fun at first but now with no income and very few cases this was proving to be a complete bust. I mean, come on, we hadn't had a good case in a few weeks. Sure, we found Miss Carter's missing gold earrings, but they had been under her refrigerator. That wasn't a challenge.

But tonight was a different story. I was taping my pencil on my desk finishing writing down another case report when it happened.

A shrill shriek came piercing to my ears. Immediately, I saw Homes descending the staircase that lead up to our shared apartment above our office. Her face was flushed, and her eyes were widened. This can't be good, I thought to myself.

"Watson, you have to see this!" She shrieked while flipping on the television that we had downstairs in the office. She flipped through some channels until she found what she was looking for.

Not again, I moaned to myself. I love Homes like a sister; trust me, I do; however, there was one thing that made her go more psycho than anything and that was… dare I say it… pro wrestling.

In the ring, stood a young man who looked to be about no more than thirty years of age. Tattoos ran down his shoulders, and he firmly watched over the ring, pacing the stage back and forth. It was none other than Randy Orton, one of her favorites and also one of mine; let's just say that awhile ago the Legend Killer made a favorable impression on yours truly. But something seemed off about his appearance. At first, I couldn't place it, but then right before I had my thoughts firmly wrapped around it, did Homes shout:

"Watson, Randy Orton has a beard! Why does Randy Orton have a beard? It's not natural!"

"Calm down, Homes. I'm sure there is a logical explanation for it." But just as the words left my mouth the doorbell rang. I left Homes staring wide eyed at the television, trying to work some sense into this little conundrum. When I opened the door, I was greeted by a young man.

His blue eyes stared directly down at me. His head was shaved, so that his hair wouldn't fall into his eyes. He was built like someone I had seen a million times before, but I just couldn't place him. His name was on the tip of my tongue, but before I could greet him, Homes let out another ear piercing shriek.

"Oh my god, Matthew Orton is in our office!" She screeched. Instantly, I looked over at the television and saw that the young man standing before me was indeed the younger Orton brother. I watched the television as it showed Randy and Matt in the ring. Then I quickly looked back to make sure I wasn't seeing things.

"Uh no offense, but how are you here and not there?" I questioned Matt as he gave the signature Orton smirk- you know the one that makes woman swoon?

"It's recorded," Matt laughed. "Not that I don't appreciate standing out here in the cold ladies, but could I please come in?"

"Of course," said Homes as she rushed and pushed me aside pulling Matt in. It had been raining that night, and he was soaking wet. "Can I get you anything? Coffee, tea, umm…"

Yeah, Homes was in fan girl heaven right now.

"I hate be a bother, but Mr. Orton why are you here?" I questioned while crossing my arms across my chest.

"First, don't call me Mr. Orton; it makes me feel old. I'm only twenty-seven," he said with a scowl. He had been wrestling since he was eighteen. "And second, I'm here because while I heard you two are the best private eye detectives this town has to offer."

"Woah, woah, woah, we have had like three cases, and you want to hire us?" I questioned as I received an elbow to the side shutting me up.

"If Matt wants to hire us, then I say let him hire us, so what can we do for you?" A very pleased and happy Homes said soaking up the attention of the MKOing superstar.

"Well, you just saw it right there on television; my brother's beard is the problem," Matt said awkwardly as both Homes and I burst out laughing. When we finally caught our breath, we realized this was serious.

"Okay, Matt, I understand that a lot of fan girls want to tackle your brother with a shaver right now, but I don't think that gives justification to hiring private eye detectives," I said folding my arms firm across my chest.

"Plus, if it's so important, why don't you just slip into his room and shave it off in the middle of the night; I heard Randy is a very sound sleeper," Homes said as both Matt and I turned are heads raising our eyebrows at her. "What I hear things?"

"But really, why are you here?" I ask again. Matt sighed as he looked from me to Homes.

"The truth is Ryder, Bourne, Cena, and I all have a bet. Whoever can find out why Randy has the beard first gets five hundred dollars," Matt said looking at the two of us. "If you don't want to help now, I completely understand; I mean, it's really lame."

"You're certainly right! Trying to use our business for your own personal gain, well, I never!" I scowled. But by the look on Homes face, I could tell this was not over by a long shot. Then she got this starry eyed look on her face. I only knew that look to well. She had a plan. Oh no.

"Matt, we will help you even if Miss Grouchy Pants doesn't want to. Come on, we have things to discuss."

And with that, Homes led Matt into her office as I followed behind them. For some reason, I had a sinking feeling about this. Sure, I wanted Randy to shave but so did every other girl on the planet.

Let's just hope Homes knows what she's doing.

Or that Matthew Orton does.

(XXXX)

Several days passed since first meeting Matt. And each day was a new adventure. He would tell us what happened before Randy grew the 'monstrosity' as it had become known as. But we just couldn't place why it had come.

Today though was interrogation day. See, I wanted no part in this. I mean sure, Matt was there protecting us, but when three hundred pound men are in front of you with bulging muscles just waiting to break something in half, you're bound to feel uncomfortable.

First up to interrogate was Evan Bourne.

Matt had arranged the interrogations to take place inside the ring. Homes and I sat on one side of a table while the accused- no, I mean, suspect- no I mean witness- oh hell I don't know -the wrestler sat on the other side. Matt stood in a corner, looking like a really super strong body guard with glasses across his face. It was like a bad episode of CSI.

But it was only going to get worse with the questions that Homes was going to ask.

"Evan Bourne, that is your name, correct?" questioned Homes as she pushed herself up against the table, trying to scare the cute little superstar.

"Yes and no," Evan answered us as Homes cocked her head at him. "That's my ring name. My real name is Matt Korklan."

"So you think you're two people?" Questioned Homes a bit startled.

"No, but please just call me Evan," the Airbourne Superstar told the two detectives.

"So you're Evan right now. Does that mean when you're angry, you go all Hulk on everyone but instead of screaming 'Hulk angry!' you scream 'Matt angry'?" Homes asked. It took everything I had to not burst out laughing at that, but before I could, Matt Orton did that just for me.

"Evan, what do you know about Randy's beard?" I questioned, changing the subject.

"Not much," he said, shrugging at me. "All everyone knows is that Randy wanted to look more aggressive, but between you and me, I think some fan told him that he couldn't pull off a beard, and he took it as a challenge."

"Randy doesn't take lightly to challenges," the younger Orton brother said in a matter of fact manner.

"So there's one plausible explanation to the situation, thanks Mr. Bourne," Homes said as Evan shrugged, giving his signature grin at Homes and me, shook his head at Matt, and left the ring.

"So who's next?" I asked, looking at Matt who just let out a low laugh as Homes and I exchanged a look.

"You, two, will have fun with this," Matt said but before another word could be said: "Woo, Woo, Woo!" echoed through the empty arena.

"Ugh, great," I muttered flinging myself back into the chair. "What could he possibly know about Randy's beard?"

"You'd be surprised what Zack knows," Matt tried to explain to me as Homes ran up and touched Zack's spikey hair, but before he could continue his explanation, we were interrupted.

"Woo, Woo, Woo, You know it!" Zack Ryder yelled at us, throwing off his sunglasses right into my face.

Oh, he better have something good to say before I send him back to Long Island without his Iced Z!

(XXXX)

"So Zack, what do you know about Randy's beard?" questioned Homes, eyeing up the Long Island superstar like he actually had killed someone.

"Well that that broski over there is going to lose a bet if he's not careful," Zack told us. "But what are you, two, lovely broskis doing hanging around with him anyway?"

"I'm a girl, you idiot! Don't call me "broski" again, or you will regret it…" I growled at Zack.

"She has a temper," I heard Matt whisper to Homes, who just nodded as Zack squirmed in his seat.

Before more could be said by Ryder, we were interrupted by someone. I'll give you one guess. No, it wasn't Matt's brother but more like his brother's best friend.

"Matt, what are you doing out here?" John Cena questioned as he waltzed into the ring. Cena gave one look at Homes and me and smiled revealing those cute dimples. Wait, what am I saying? I'm not a Cena fan by any means.

Homes, on the other hand, fainted at the sight in front of her. Thank god, Matt was standing right next to her; otherwise, she would have hit the canvas… very hard.

"Is she going to be okay?" An alarmed Cena inquired."Yeah, give her some time; she's a huge fan of yours," I told him. "But anyways, it's your turn for interrogation."

"Interrogation?" He questioned looking at Matt who shrugged at him. "Matt…"

But before more could be said, Homes came around and shoed Ryder away as John took his place in the interrogation chair.

"So John Anthony Felix Cena, that's your name correct?" I asked. Homes was still in shock.

"Last time I checked, it most definitely was," John answered sarcastically.

"Where were you on the night of the 23rd of April?" Homes blurted out.

"Uh celebrating my birthday with the guys… what does that have to do with anything?" Cena questioned.

"Umm…" Homes quickly avoided that question. "Why does Randy have his beard- surely you know something, being his best friend and all?"

"Oh, that's easy," John began, but before more could be said, Zack Ryder reentered the ring.

"Man, don't tell these broskis anything!" Zack shouted.

"That's it!" I screamed, stomping over to Zack. Business was about to pick up.

(XXXX)

(Homes's POV)

Man, was Watson angry that Zack Ryder had called us broskis again. I hadn't seen her that angry since I tore her favorite Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle sweatshirt, and I had feared for my life that day."What's she doing to him?" Matt asked me as Watson put Ryder into a sleeper hold. I saw Matt watch her administer the hold, and he cringed recalling all the times Randy had put him in one of those.

"Is Zack going to be okay?" Cena questioned as he came up from behind us. I shrugged my shoulders at him.

"It depends on how pissed off Watson was. So you guys want to go get coffee?" I asked. Both men nodded, but before we rounded the corner of the stage, we were stopped by the one, the only, the Apex Predator, The Viper, Randy Orton.

"What the hell is going on out here?" he questioned, looking from Cena to me to the ring and finally landing his eyes on Matt. "Matt…"

"Randy, I can explain…" Matt tried to reason with his older brother.

"John already told me about the bet, Matt. But hiring two private eye detectives? Don't you think that seems a little out of hand? And plus if you really wanted to know why I had the beard, why didn't you just ask?" The Viper questioned, looking down at his younger brother.

"So Mr. All Knowing and Logical One, what's with the beard?" I blurted out earning a stare down from the Viper himself.

"Well Miss…"

"Homes," I stated happily.

"The real reason I have the beard is because I forgot my razor when we went over to Quatar," Randy said to all of us. My eyes practically bulged out of my head.

"Wow, all this just to get that statement out of you?" I muttered to myself. "Whatever you do, don't tell Watson; she's going to want to kill you if she hears."

"Don't tell Watson what?" Watson asked, wiping sweat off her brow.

"Where's Ryder?" John and Matt asked. Watson gave a playful smirk as she walked past us and around the corner grinning coyly at Randy while doing so.

"So, coffee, anyone?" I asked again heading out of the arena.

(XXXX)

Several hours later…

"I'm serious that's how Matt and I met." Randy was telling the story of how he and Matt had met after being separated at a very young age.

"Hey anybody seen Ryder?" Cena wondered, coming up with an iced tea and handing it to me. I nodded my head in thanks. What? It was the least he could do after we found out the truth behind Randy having the beard.

"He probably went to go film his web show early," Matt interrupted, eating from the bag of marshmallows that I had picked up on our way to the coffee shop.

"If you would excuse us for a second, gentleman," I said, dragging Watson along behind me to go to the bathroom. When we got there, I stood giving her the death stare. "What did you do with Zack?"

"Oh nothing bad," Watson said with a gleam in her eye. "Just… our next case will probably be The Case of the Missing Iced Z!"

"You worry me," I told her, shaking my head as we walked back to the guys. "So…"

"So," said Matt looking at the two of us with a smile,"Thanks for all your help."

"It's no problem, plus I learned some valuable stuff," I said with a wink.

"Like what?" Everyone questioned.

"That Randy was forced to read Twilight once," I responded, letting Matt take over from there.

And so ends the case of the beard; I can't help think that we're forgetting something. Hmm… it will come to me eventually.

(XXXX)

Elsewhere back at the arena…A loud banging could be heard on the supply closest door and every once in a while, there was the sound of something being snapped in two.

"Come on, guys, this isn't funny anymore!" Zack Ryder called out, but no one answered.

Watson had locked this broski in a closest.

"Matt!"

"John!"

"Randy!"

"Private eye- detective girls!" cried Zack once again. "Come on; I've learned my lesson! Somebody let me out of here! I'm afraid of the dark! And think there maybe cockroaches in here!"

Just then Zack felt something crawl across his leg.

"Mommy!"

The End…?

(XXXX)

**Thanks to caylendar for the help! And special thanks to her and SuspiciousInitials for letting me use your OCs. You two are the best!**

**So until next time, eat some Double Fudge brownie ice cream, light off some explosives, march to the beat of your own drum, and please review! ~Always with much love, ~L.**


End file.
